christmas

Sad… been feeling sad recently. Christmas is just around the corner. Sadly, I don’t feel the presence of it. The country's really down right now even if the supposedly remittance of our modern heroes are to salvage our country. The cool weather every morning is still felt; however, it doesn’t bring any delight like it did before when I was young. Things are really different now. Yes I know that change is inevitable in our lives but I never thought it would be this drastic. People say that our lives are like wheels; you can be on top one minute and at the bottom the next. You never know what life may bring.

Speaking of life, I can't believe I'm almost graduating. Just two more years. Two more years, Dad. I'm going to help you don't worry. I'm in my sophomore year in college; don't you and Mom worry yourselves about me and the future. There's definitely a future for us. There's nothing else that can distract me from doing what I have to do. Doing what my obligation is. Doing what needs to be done. I won't let our family down. I know you guys are relying on me. I won't fail you like my sister did. I learned from other people's lives and I have enough experiences and knowledge to last me this long in life. You guys taught me well. I know I'm a strong person. I know I'm strong enough to handle what life will throw at me. This time around, no more distractions. It’s finally over. I'm dealing with what matters in my life -- our family. I'm going to take care of our family. I'm going to graduate and you'll see me go up the stage and get my diploma, Dad. I'm doing this for you, for the family. I gave up my dream for the moment just so I can fulfill what you guys want for me. I have no idea where I'm going or what this will bring me. As long as you guys are there right by my side, believing in me that I can do this, that I can accomplish anything, I know I won't fall astray. I just wish that you won't leave me in the middle of my journey. I've had enough people leave my side while on this journey. Please don't. Lord please be kind enough to give my family, esp. my Dad, good health and harmony for our family.
It's sad that things are not how they used to be. I now know what you and Mom are feeling when I was still a kid. I now realize the reality that life is not laden in a silver platter. Not everything in life lasts forever. But that not necessarily mean that we should give up. Rather, we should work harder and prove that we'll be able to make it. Challenges are not given to us if God knows we are not capable of overcoming them. I know our family will survive. I just wish it'll wait for me… After all of this, I'm going to pursue my dream. Even if I don't get to finish it, even just half of it will do for me. As long as I got to feel how it was to live my dream would be enough for me. This is my wish before I depart. Just in case. I'm going to bring back what we had before. It might not be all, but at least half of it I'd try. Or I will die trying. I won't give up without a fight. I promise you that. I know you guys are proud of me. Of what I've accomplished so far. I won't stop there. I won't stop chasing my dreams. It will remain a dream if I don't do something to attain it. I'm glad that even if my life's twisted and everything, I'm still given great parents to be my mentors, to be my family. Merry Christmas, Mom and Dad, I love you.

Your daughter Elise